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When it comes to dating a coworker, there's one general rule: Don't do it. But sometimes, that's way easier said than done - especially if your job requires you to spend long hours and tight cubicles with the same person. Tempting and steamy as it may be, it can also turn out to be super awkward and traumatic - something we all saw unfold on the first season of UnREAL and - spoiler alert! But hey, if you're going to cozy up with a coworker, just follow these nine rules that'll help make things easier. Sleep on it. Like in the "think about it for a few extra days" way, not in the literal sense. In any other dating scenario, you might be eager to jump in bed with your crush a week after meeting, but in this case, do not rush.

Are you willing to live with the regret of not knowing?

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If the answer is no, then go for it. Inform your superiors. Grab your boss for a meeting to make he or she aware the situation before they end up hearing about it at the proverbial water cooler. Keeping them in the loop upfront not only shows respect but that you're mature enough to deal with the situation. No need to go into details about your feelings for bae, but do tell your boss that the relationship won't interfere with your work performance.

Then close your mouth.

How to Keep an Office Romance From Derailing Your Career

Rather than turning it into the source of all office gossip in perpetuity, use discretion when telling your coworkers. Keep your attention where it should be during office hours.

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You're not being paid to date, so don't spend your time on the clock making googly eyes across the conference room table. This goes beyond just physical PDA - keep conversations at the office related to the job.

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Shelve last night's argument or tonight's dinner plans while you're there. What happens between you two should stay that way. Keep coworkers out of your relationship.

The 12 Rules for Dating a Colleague

Your coworkers shouldn't have to be a part of any relationship squabbles and take sides, and you shouldn't ask them to. You'll end up looking far worse and pettier than the object of your anger. Rely on your own merit for professional growth.

May 18,   9. Don't make "coworkers" your type. If you break up with a coworker, do yourself a favor and don't date another one. You'll suddenly go from someone who dated a Author: Darla Murray. Think twice. You might be nervous to consider dating a coworker, and you're right to feel that way. Because a romance could have an impact on your reputation and could even prevent you from. Apr 14,   How to Date (Responsibly) at Work. met Matt through a colleague at the imaging tech company where they both worked. Topics dating relationships dating advice dating tips. Authentic.

Obviously you have each other's back - just as you would for any colleague you respect - but don't rely on your love interest to help you score a coveted account, new role, or praise from your boss. When Ruettimann was working in corporate HR for Pfizer, she heard rumors that her now-husband's department was going to be outsourced. Sounds harsh, but sharing the info could have gotten her fired.

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Fortunately, their relationship survived, but it's a reminder that mixing romance and work can get complicated. The biggest hazard of workplace relationships is the biggest hazard of all relationships: They end. Take Lauren, 28, a video editor who secretly dated a coworker for weeks. He flaked on a weekend getaway, then stopped texting. You could call it ghosting, except she sees him every day in the office kitchen.

Jan 26,   The first rule of dating someone at work is knowing if you actually can, says Susan Bartell, Psy.D., a clinical psychologist with a specialty in interpersonal and work relationships. Some companies ban office romance outright, while others ban dating among direct colleagues, such as superiors and juniors (and teammates). Sep 12,   All Dating Advice Dating Experiences Best Online meaning the odds are good that you'll catch some feels for a colleague eventually. But here's the . Jun 24,   However, dating within the workplace has its advantages too. If you find yourself falling for a colleague, the experts offer some do's and don'ts to follow so you don't end up with a failed relationship and career issues to solve. DO: Adhere to company Ashley Papa.

The takeaway? When two careers are tangled, a what-if plan is key.

May 13,   After you begin dating, make sure your feelings remain mutual. Your partner should not feel pressured to stay in the relationship. Sexual harassment suits are unpleasant for everyone involved. Be aware of what constitutes it and don't do anything that a colleague could take for an unwanted sexual advance. Discretion Is Key. Aug 15,   How this was a very bad idea - dating a coworker secretly in a startup could only end poorly. If this date was the only one we had, we would not interact differently at work. If this date was not the only one we had, we would not interact differently at work. Our mixed reviews of the recent Star Trek movies - hey, it was Dating a colleague advice - Want to meet eligible single woman who share your zest for life? Indeed, for those who've tried and failed to find the right man offline, internet dating can provide. How to get a good man. It is not easy for women to find a good man, and to be honest it is not easy for a man to find a good woman. Find a man in my area!

Then reality-check yourself. There is good news. When workplace dating goes well, it goes really well. Happily coupled-up workers have reported higher job satisfaction, says Cowan.

Dating colleague advice

And the office is surprisingly a great place to vet a future partner. Plus, sometimes you can fall in love even more when you watch someone excel. Nick, the digital-media editor who dated a colleague, now works somewhere else, but he left with an intense appreciation for his girlfriend.

A lightning round of opinions from women who've tried it Yes: "I found it completely energizing professionally. I wanted to impress him.

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No: "Don't do it unless you're fine with the fact that everyone-including your boss-will know. Yes: "It was nice to date someone with a similar schedule.

If you have ambitions of a romantic relationship with a colleague then you need (a) to be very confident they feel the same way and (b) find a way to cultivate it outside the office. Sensitivities vary greatly between individual's and one person's flattering compliment by the photocopier is another's lewd come-on.

We could talk about work and not worry if the other person 'got it. The more you can keep work and play separate, the healthier your dual working-romantic life will be.


Showing up to the office in the same clothes you wore yesterday is not a good look. Want to split the ride to work? How about getting lunch together if you have breaks that line up?

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